What to expect from your first counseling session in Tacoma
Tacoma Therapist tells What to expect from your first counseling therapy session.
You know things aren’t good. Maybe they haven’t been good for a while. Something’s got to change. But you aren’t sure what to do, or how to do it. What does therapy look like? How long will it take to start feeling better? Your mind may be spinning, looking for solutions, but nothing’s working. Or you may be stuck at a dead end. How can a coach, counselor, or therapist in Tacoma, WA help?
What will happen after you decide to schedule?
As a trauma and relationship therapist in Tacoma I know that moving slowly, feeling a sense of control over the process, and building trust are important first steps. I need to get to know you to understand your personal experiences, beliefs, and build trust with you. So from our first contact I provide options so that you can choose how you want to connect, and so you can set the pace. After we schedule your first appointment, I provide some information about myself and my practice, and encourage you to take time to review it. You may want to write down questions you have for our upcoming appointment. I encourage you to review my website and any informational resources I may provide so that you can feel more comfortable when we meet.
What do you need to do to prepare for the first session?
Before the first session I will send you consent forms to sign, and some optional questionnaires to help me get to know you. You do not have to provide any personal information that you don’t feel comfortable sharing yet. You do need to sign all forms that require a signature. You may find it helpful to look up the route to my office, and prepare to take a few minutes to pay for parking (street metered or lot, by app or kiosk). If you prefer a Telehealth appointment, you will want to have a private space, a good internet connection, and plenty of battery power. You can download the app (Telehealth by Simple Practice) to your phone or tablet and paste the appointment link there, or just click the link from your email reminder on your computer. I send email reminders a couple of days before the appointment, and often again just a few minutes before (because finding an email even 2 days old can sometimes be hard with all of the spam out there). You can also add a bookmark to my secure portal and get a link to your appointment. (My secure portal link is in my email signature, and you will have access as soon as you complete your initial paperwork). Other than that, you can just show up. No need to prepare anything to talk about, or feel like you have to bring something. I will guide you in the beginning.
What happens in the first session?
The first session can feel like it goes pretty quickly. We review the paperwork you signed and any questionnaires you completed. I answer any questions that you have. We get an idea of what brings you to therapy and what it might look like when you are done with therapy. In the beginning I often provide some basic education about mental health, and we create a mental health plan so that you have some ready skills and resources available once we begin more of the deep work. Most importantly, I start to get to know you. I like to do this by asking some questions about you and your life, your relationships, and the things that you don’t like about any of it. Sometimes I use some visual tools to help answer these questions, like a Wellness Wheel or a Value Sort Activity, or a meditation to help you connect to your body, your emotions, or calm your thoughts. We end the appointment with a sketch of what your goal might be; what you want from therapy.
Will I have homework?
As a past teacher, and lifelong student, I’m a fan of homework. But I also know that homework isn’t for everybody. The homework I give is always optional, usually at your request, and it’s totally ok if you don’t do it, even if you asked me for it. Much of the therapy I do does not require homework to see results, but I do think that homework can be a great way to make the most of the hard work you are doing. I believe that therapy is a practice, as much as it is anything. I believe we are retraining your brain and body to think, feel, and act differently. Any athlete knows that training is important if you want to see results. And whether it’s studying for exams, preparing a presentation for work, or building a relationship with someone you love: practice, repetition, and persistence increase the likelihood of success. Plus, my homework is usually fun. (But I am kind of a nerd…)
When will I have my next session?
I see clients for trauma and relationship therapy weekly. Research shows that consistency, regularity, and repetition are important for lasting healing and change. Rhythm and routine are foundational aspects of a mentally healthy mind. Whether it’s a circadian rhythm, the phases of the moon, or the calendar year, rhythms and routines are a part of human nature. Part of my work is to help you become aware of, and be able to intentionally manipulate your own rhythms and routines to create a cadence that provides mental wellbeing in your life. There is a reason I use the word “practice” in my therapy. Weekly sessions are part of the practice. The growth you have between sessions is also part of the practice. As you practice better mental health (including healing trauma and relationships) you become mentally well. A mentally well mind is able to handle unexpected events, navigate complex relationships, and problem solve with clarity.
What if I don’t like what happened in the first session or I am not sure it is a good match?
What to expect from your first counseling therapy session in Tacoma, WA Connect at www.counselinginwashington.com to learn more Heal Grow Connect Find Meaning
Being in therapy is always your choice. If you do not like what is happening or you are not sure it’s a good match, it is important to say something. Sometimes people feel uncomfortable saying something, but I like to reframe it this way: one of the best lessons you can learn in therapy is how to identify your needs and wants, and communicate them clearly to others. While you may be coming to therapy to practice some of that, you are in therapy for you so if it’s not working for you, please say something. You can count that as a win if you change that one thing. And your therapist should welcome this information. If they don’t, you made the right decision to end things. If they do, you may just have hit the next level of connection and understanding. Your therapist may be able to change things up, or may agree with you, or may be able to find you someone who is a better match. Having the discussion is the first step to getting what you want from therapy.
Of course I want to add a caveat, because I know that sometimes therapy creates discomfort as part of the growth (think growing pains). Often people quit therapy when things get uncomfortable, or if accountability is coming into play. It can be easy to say “therapy didn’t work” or “I didn’t have a good experience with my therapist” and sometimes this is true. But I do believe in the placebo effect too, and that if you want therapy to work, you can have good therapy with a mediocre therapist. I also think, ‘but why would you want to?’. So I encourage you to ask yourself honestly if therapy didn’t work, or you didn’t like your therapist, or if perhaps you were avoiding the discomfort of what was coming up in therapy. It is common for people to stop therapy just as good work is occurring. And it is totally ok to stop, but what if you kept going? What if you moved through the discomfort to the other side. Even if it’s just having that difficult conversation with your therapist to say “we are not a good match.” (And you can always increase the likelihood that you will like how the session went, and do feel like it’s a good match, if you do your homework before you start therapy…like reading this blog, and doing free consults with multiple therapists to see who you like, and knowing why you want to go to therapy and what you expect from therapy).
Showing up to the first counseling session can be nerve-wracking for even the most courageous among us. Do yourself a favor and remind yourself that you get to decide if you want to keep going, how long you go, and when you are done. Remind yourself why you are doing this difficult thing, and what you hope to get from it. And know your therapist is rooting for you too. I’m so happy and humbled to work with my clients. They amaze me with their courage, vulnerability, and trust. I don’t take that lightly.
Katie Lorz, Counselor for Women in Tacoma, WA
I hope this helps you find the right therapist in Tacoma. If you are still feeling stuck, feel free to call me at (435) 776-5959 for a free 15 minute phone consultation. I’d be happy to hear about what is happening and help direct you to the right person. If you are looking for help with anxiety, depression, low self confidence, low motivation, stress, toxic relationships, counseling for women, counseling for men, trauma and relationship counseling, or Lifespan integration therapy, you can read more about how I can help here.
